So first thing's first. What happens to fingenail clippings? I bite my nails a ton, and few things are more satisfying than realizing you've neglected one of your fingers for a few days, then biting that sucker off.
I live for that. My life is an odd one.
But then,perhaps you flick them, perhaps you *ttttttthhhhhhhhhhP* spit them out. Where do they go? I think there's a species of elf that come out of our furniture, take the nail clippings, and make Christmas toys out of them. Hope you loved your dolls and k'nex sets as a kid.
Sometimes the cat makes a noise exactly like this toy my sister had when we were little. It was an orange cylinder with a cow on it, and when you turned it over, it went "EAOORRRRRRRB". It was supposed to sound like a cow, but ended up more like a calf or a lamb, which I feel was the USDA's way of subliminally getting children to enjoy veal and gyros. I love both things.
I found this today, and I think I'll be sending it to people a lot:
Motley Crue seem like a bunch of dicks, but "Shout At The Devil" is an awesome album.
I'm going to start a new feature on this bloggity blog, called "Dick of the Day". Today's Dick of the Day is none other than Chase Bank! Congratulations for being a morally reprehensible bunch of lazy dickbags. Aside from other things, JP Morgan Chase has earned tonight's title by receiving 97.4 billion dollars in taxpayer bailout money (http://www.seiu.org/a/profilechase.php). What a bunch of dicks.
This blog has hit an impossible low.