Tuesday, January 7, 2014

Thoughts of the night, 1/7/14

I'm going to sit here and force my brain to think of stuff that may or may not be interesting, because I feel the need to write stuff.

So first thing's first. What happens to fingenail clippings? I bite my nails a ton, and few things are more satisfying than realizing you've neglected one of your fingers for a few days, then biting that sucker off.

I live for that. My life is an odd one.

But then,perhaps you flick them, perhaps you *ttttttthhhhhhhhhhP* spit them out. Where do they go? I think there's a species of elf that come out of our furniture, take the nail clippings, and make Christmas toys out of them. Hope you loved your dolls and k'nex sets as a kid.
Sometimes the cat makes a noise exactly like this toy my sister had when we were little. It was an orange cylinder with a cow on it, and when you turned it over, it went "EAOORRRRRRRB". It was supposed to sound like a cow, but ended up more like a calf or a lamb, which I feel was the USDA's way of subliminally getting children to enjoy veal and gyros. I love both things.
I found this today, and I think I'll be sending it to people a lot:
Frank Turner, a singer/songwriter from England, wrote in a song called "Try This At Home" that "there's no such thing as rock stars, there's just people who play music. And some of them are just like us, and some of them are dicks". I feel this is applicable to all groups in society, including the "untouchables" such as nuns and Buddhist monks. Maybe not the monks, but definitely the nuns. Point is, some people are put on pedestals as being "above" normal folks, but really, they're just normal people in strange positions who are either cool, or they're dicks.

Motley Crue seem like a bunch of dicks, but "Shout At The Devil" is an awesome album.
I'm going to start a new feature on this bloggity blog, called "Dick of the Day". Today's Dick of the Day is none other than Chase Bank! Congratulations for being a morally reprehensible bunch of lazy dickbags. Aside from other things, JP Morgan Chase has earned tonight's title by receiving 97.4 billion dollars in taxpayer bailout money (http://www.seiu.org/a/profilechase.php). What a bunch of dicks.
 This blog has hit an impossible low.